So What?

So I'm me, you're you, we're all we, that's all we'll be, so let's be we and not care what people think about you and me.

 

(I… Crap. You're in one of those moods, aren't you?)

 

Yup. And I'm fully caffeinated. You may want to sit down for this one.

 

(Son of a… *sigh* Okay. Go for it.)

 

Actually it won't be that bad. I promise your brain can handle it. Well, most of your brains. Some of you, well, I know you too well. Anywhoos… Here's the thing – I've seen a couple of stories in the media lately about the body-shaming of two, prominent, pop music icons. In the one instance, some media-type in Britain went off on how "fat" singer Kelly Clarkson has gotten. Ok, so there's this: a) Who the f*ck cares? B)  Considering the media-type looked like she fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down, who the hell is she to criticize? And 3) WHO. THE. F*CK. CARES???

 

Clarkson's response was, essentially paraphrased "I don't care what anyone thinks. I'm enjoying my life, motherhood and feel fantastic." Good for you, Kelly. Because honestly I think you're adorable in any event. Embrace your life and live it how you see fit. Don't let some aesthetically challenged twit disparage you.

 

(Okay, playing devil's advocate here – aren't you committing the same foul by disparaging the media personality's appearance?)

 

I love that I imagine my readers to be so astute. Yes. Yes I am, and frankly I do so for the purpose of making a point. Everyone has an opinion. I have no more right to discuss another's appearance than she did to discuss Clarkson's. While I did so to illustrate a point, this person did so because… why, exactly? Exactly. There was no reason to make such comments. The same goes for the recent reports about P!nk. For those unfamiliar, P!nk had a photo taken with her daughter and for some reason, the logic of which completely escapes me, someone thought P!nk looked fat in the photo.

 

Say what??? Okay, in full disclosure, P!nk turns me on and scares the sh*t out of me at the same time. I saw the picture at the heart of this "controversy" and had to wipe a bit-o-drool. To think that someone else thought… Some people are just dumber than a box of rocks, I swear. P!nk's response though? Basically "F*ck you. I feel beautiful." Because so what? She's a rock star.

 

(She's got her rock moves, and she don't need you tonig… DAMMIT!!!!)

 

Earwormed. Suckers. Within the first 500 words, too. *snicker*

 

(*gives evil eye*)

 

Oh stop it. The nicer weather is finally upon us and that's an awesome, top/windows down kind of tune. But it provides a perfect background for this discussion. The earlier line in the song states "So what? I'm still a rock star. I got my rock moves. And you're a tool." I couldn't say it any better. We as a society are too obsessed with the way other people look/act/do/perform/whatever. If Kelly Clarkson doesn't feel the need to be a size 2, what the hell business is it of ours? And if you think P!nk looks fat, please wear this tin foil hat because clearly you were placed here  among us by aliens hell bent on destroying society.

 

My point is this: mind your own business. If you think someone's fat, try taking a look in the mirror. And stop. Judging. Another fine example of this occurs on pretty much every other woman's profile on Match.com. What are the vast majority of women looking for in a man? Six feet or taller, slim or athletic and toned. Really, honey? Because I've seen your photos, too. You're not exactly svelte and I wouldn't claim that your face could launch a dozen ships let alone a thousand like Helen of Troy. Judge not, lest ye be judged. I do find it ironic that again, the vast majority of the woman who list those qualities amongst those they seek… are still single and searching. You know why? Because you're judgmental and unrealistic.

 

(Bitter much?)

 

Honestly, yes, I am a little bitter about the whole thing. Granted men do it too, don't get me wrong. And yes, if I look at your picture and I'm not physically attracted to you, I will pass your profile by. But I'm not going to be so presumptuous as to say that I'm specifically looking for someone who's a size 2 with big… eyes. You never know who will finally claim your heart, so why narrow the field so drastically? I got news for you ladies – there's something to be said for Joe Average, as there is for Jane Average, fellas. People who look like Greek Gods look that way for a reason – because they focus on themselves. Is that really the kind of person you want?

 

I don't know. I guess I just find it sadly, pathetically amusing how we as a people continue to judge one another based on the dumbest criteria. I've said it before – I've known some incredibly, physically attractive people who are amongst the ugliest souls I've ever met. It ain't all about appearance.

 

(You're making sense again. Please stop. You're scaring me.)

 

Sorry. I'm just me. Smell like I sound, lost in a crowd….

 

(And I'm hungry like the wolf… Seriously. Now I really hate you.)

 

You cannot hate me for Duran Duran. Mouth is alive, all running inside….

 

(And I'm hungr…. SONOFANUTCRACKER STOP THAT!)

 

Judge me for my earworms, not my appearance. Wait, I take that back. Don't judge me at all. Shake your head, tease me, laugh at me, laugh with me, but don't judge me. And I won't judge you. Unless you think Keanu Reeves is a good actor. Then you're getting judged, and you just brought that on yourself.

 

(You really do need help.)

 

I know. It's part of my charm. So What?

 

 

© 2015 J.J. Goodman. All rights reserved.