Wordinessness and Grammarocity

Following in the linguistic footsteps of Dubbya's strategery and Stephen Colbert's truthiness, I bring you the following list of utterly as useful as they are completely made up words to incorporate into your vernacular. Have enjoyousness reading.

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Conversate (v) – To participate in the act of engaging in conversation.  Example: He needs to conversate with his wife about buying a motorcycle.

Communiplative (adj) – adjective used to describe one who contemplates aloud while seeking the advice of others. Example: He was communiplative with his buddies on how to conversate with his wife about buying a motorcycle.  

Denialation (n) – The annihilation of dreams brought on by spousal denial.  Example: After conversating with his wife, his plan to buy a motorcycle was met with swift denialation.

Beeritation (n) – Irritation exacerbated by the induction of alcohol. Example: Sad that he had been denialated a motorcycle, he went to the bar to get drunk which left his wife incredibly beeritated.

Proctologicalism (n) – Reasoning derived by speaking out of one's ass. Example: His argument that he'd be safer sober on a motorcycle than drunk and stumbling home from the bar was one of the better examples of his proctologicalism to date.

Insomnimaniac (n) – One driven to madness by virtue of insomnia. Example: Staying up all night trying to think of ways to convince his wife to let him buy a motorcycle was slowing turning him into an insomnimaniac.

Buffalower (v) – The act of lowering one's spirits as a result of unrealistic expectations in one's professional sports teams. [Note: This is usually limited to colloquial usage in Western New York] Example: Already feeling down because his wife wouldn't let him get a motorcycle, his mood was buffalowered even further by the Sabres' seventh loss in a row.

Employmentitis (n) – A debilitation condition whereby one's employment creates discord in one's life and/or prevents the achievement of goals. Example: If he wasn't suffering a severe case of employmentitis, he'd have enough cash to just buy a motorcycle without having to get permission from his wife.

Exaggeratate (v) – To overly and excessively exaggerate in emphasis of a thought, point or ideal. Example: His claim that there are over a billion different reasons why he should have a motorcycle is a gross exaggeratation.

Indifferentiality (n) – The ability to remain completely indifferent to the wants and/or needs of others. Example: Unless and until he took her to a Luke Bryant concert, she would remain indifferential to his desire for a motorcycle.

Egostration (n) – The utter destruction and removal of one's ego. Example: The laughter with which his friends erupted when he told them his wife wouldn't let him get a motorcycle was one of the worst egostrations he'd suffered since high school.

Uniterate (v) – The opposite of reiterate, i.e. the desire to immediately withdraw words, phrases or other verbal expressions of stupidity. Example: As soon as he said to her "well, I'm buying a motorcycle anyway," he wished he could uniterate the words.

Angerocity (n) – Anger multiplied by ferocity. Example: He was not prepared for the angerocity with which she threw her shoe at him when he told her that he was buying a motorcycle over her objection.

Suavebility (n) – The ability to calmly, coolly, and convincingly diffuse a hostile situation. Example: She was not prepared for the suavebility with which he explained that he only said he was getting a motorcycle to be sure that she really cared and wasn't just objecting because he had forgotten their anniversary.

And, lastly…

Is (v) - …Yeah I got nothin'. You're going to have to check with Bill on this one. I guess it depends.

© J.J. Goodman 2013. All rights reserved.