Three Things that Aren't Two Hundred

So, um, heh heh… here's the thing. About that 200^th post? Well, er, it, uh, seems I may have miscounted. In going through my post history over the weekend I discovered that one of the numbered entries had never actually been published. The blog website, however, still counts it as a post even though it's in draft form. Therefore, it turns out, the last post, which I thought was number 199, was in fact number 198 to actually be published.

 

(So what you're saying is….)

 

What I'm saying is… THIS post is actually number 199 and not 200 as I originally anticipated.

 

(So you're an idiot, is what you're saying….)

 

Ye…HEY! Back off, man. I've said it before and I'll say it again; I went to law school so I wouldn't have to do math. Besides, I could have ignored the unpublished draft and simply gone to 200 and you'd never have been the wiser. Although now, my obsessive-compulsive disorderly friends will be going back and counting to see if this is, in fact, number 199.

 

(You sonofanutcracker. You know I have to go count now. That's worse than the earworms.)

 

That's what you get for calling me an idiot. Anywhoos… So about this draft-to-become-post-number-199… There are a few things you need to know. 1) With the exception of these introductory paragraphs, I wrote the bulk of the post below in early 2013 in the aftermath of the marital it-shay hitting the proverbial an-fay, ergo it was a dark time; 2) Perhaps I was too emotional at the time to post it. I honestly don't know, as I clearly had no recollection of writing the post to begin with; 3) It involves three things. Now I'm sure I had three specific things in mind at the time, but now I haven't the foggiest idea of what three things I might have thought of two years ago when I wrote the post; 4)  When I re-read the post over the weekend, it gave me an idea… an idea which appears at the end of the story.

 

With that, I've decided to post now what I didn't post then, and see how creative you, my readers can be.

 

(I am thoroughly confused now….)

 

You won't be. Just read. And welcome to 199.

 

***** ***** *****

 

Three things. That was all of her that he had left. Theirs was supposed to have been a life of love and laughter, filled with friends, family, and joy. Now, all he had left of that life were three things, three reminders of what could have been. The little voice inside his head told him it was better that way, but he seldom listened to that voice. That was the voice of reason. He was a man of passion whose heart had always dictated his actions. Sadly, his poetic heart led him astray too often to count the times. Perhaps if he'd simply listen to his voice of reason more often he'd find himself facing heartache more infrequently. That was about as likely, however, as finding an honest politician in Congress. Instead, he followed his heart, and now he was left with three things.

 

He'd been happy with her, more than happy, in fact. Smiles had come freely, and frequently. The laugh lines that now adorned his face evidenced that fact. Now his teeth rarely made a public appearance from beneath his forlorn lips. Little of him made public appearances these days. An introverted writer to begin with, It was really she who had gotten him to break free from the social phobia that ensnared him. Now that she was gone, he found it difficult to muster the energy. Likely full of voice mail messages from family, friends, and his therapist, his phone sat silently on the desk beside a cup of two day old coffee, its battery long since deprived of power.

 

There was no reason for him to be sitting at the desk. It wasn't as if he'd done any writing. The laptop wasn't on. Hell, it wasn't even open. It was nothing more than a placemat for the three things at which he now stared. It was the combination of allergies to dust mites and meticulous tidiness that prevented the three things from gather dust, though they hadn't moved since she'd left. They, like him, just sat there day after day. Still, he couldn't help himself. One thing gave him joy, another sorrow. And the third, the third enraged him. Yet there they sat, neatly in a row, almost as if they were waiting for him to spring to action.

 

Maybe he'd throw them away. Perhaps just throw them. Something, anything to release the burgeoning tide of emotion that welled within him. Or maybe he'd do nothing and simply hope that his inaction, his ignoring of the ghostly reminders of a love since passed, would quell the raging storm in his heart. He'd considered the fact that these three simple things may very well be keeping him balanced, and in that instance why should he do anything with them?

 

Time was drawing nearer for him to act, though, and he knew it. He could feel it. Suddenly, something stirred within him. It was not like flipping a switchto instantly produce an illuminating effect; no, this was no epiphany. It was more akin to turning the dial of an outdoor faucet, letting the surge burst forth from the spigot, coursing its way through the hose as blood through the vein, until it violently released and dispersed. This was a long time coming, a force that took time to build before erupting in crescendo.

 

He closed his eyes when the tidal wave of emotion finally reached its peak. When they opened again he stared forward, glaring at the three things in a trance-like state. Without any further thought he reached forward and took the first item into his hand….

 

 

[Three things: One joyous, one saddening, one enraging. What are the three things? Which does he reach for first? What would be your three things? Comment your thoughts, here or on Facebook, and help me write the next chapter….]

 

 

© 2015 J.J. Goodman. All rights reserved.