Happiness, Regret and Truth
There is a certain strength in solitude. I know that now. For far too long that knowledge eluded me, but it is now a firm tenet of my life. One can learn a great many things in those moments when the company you share is yours and yours alone.
Tonight I was able to make my first visit of the season to that place I call serenity Point - my happy place on the water. It is there where I have no other obligation than to simply be me. It is there where I can contemplate, or clear my mind. Tonight was a night of contemplation.
I recently engaged in a conversation of which the topics centered on happiness, and regret. It was an exchange that caused me to really think and take stock of my life. Do I regret choices that I've made? Do I know what makes me happy? Have my choices precluded my happiness, or is it that what I thought would make me happy simply isn't meant to be?
In my contemplation I've come face to face with my own hypocrisy. I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason, yet when it comes to the events of my life I've often refused to accept what's transpired. Why? Because there seemed to be no reason. Therein lies my dilemma - if I'm to believe that everything happens for a reason, I must accept that, sometimes, that reason will be unknown to me, and in other instances still, may never reveal itself at all.
I have made choices, important choices, that have affected the course of my life. Do I regret the choices that led me to this place to which I've arrived? There was a time when I would have said yes. Now, I can't be so sure I can say so. There were things I wanted to accomplish, things I expected to occupy my time, my life. Things I thought I needed to make me whole. Yet, here I am, without these things in my life, and imagine my surprise when I look in the mirror and still see the eyes of a strong man.
So what is it, then, that makes me happy? What is it that I need? I honestly no longer know. In that lack of knowledge there is a newfound freedom, one I've never really known. Once you unshackle yourself from the constraints of preconception, you're free to learn, to explore, and to experience. Through that process you learn that the things that do indeed make you happy are not what you might have expected. You also discover that things you thought were the key to your happiness were nothing of the sort or were never meant to be.
So what makes me happy? What did I discover in my solitude? A great many things. I'm ready to be happy, and perhaps that's the biggest discovery of all.
(c) J.J. Goodman 2014. All rights reserved.
Tonight I was able to make my first visit of the season to that place I call serenity Point - my happy place on the water. It is there where I have no other obligation than to simply be me. It is there where I can contemplate, or clear my mind. Tonight was a night of contemplation.
I recently engaged in a conversation of which the topics centered on happiness, and regret. It was an exchange that caused me to really think and take stock of my life. Do I regret choices that I've made? Do I know what makes me happy? Have my choices precluded my happiness, or is it that what I thought would make me happy simply isn't meant to be?
In my contemplation I've come face to face with my own hypocrisy. I am a firm believer that everything happens for a reason, yet when it comes to the events of my life I've often refused to accept what's transpired. Why? Because there seemed to be no reason. Therein lies my dilemma - if I'm to believe that everything happens for a reason, I must accept that, sometimes, that reason will be unknown to me, and in other instances still, may never reveal itself at all.
I have made choices, important choices, that have affected the course of my life. Do I regret the choices that led me to this place to which I've arrived? There was a time when I would have said yes. Now, I can't be so sure I can say so. There were things I wanted to accomplish, things I expected to occupy my time, my life. Things I thought I needed to make me whole. Yet, here I am, without these things in my life, and imagine my surprise when I look in the mirror and still see the eyes of a strong man.
So what is it, then, that makes me happy? What is it that I need? I honestly no longer know. In that lack of knowledge there is a newfound freedom, one I've never really known. Once you unshackle yourself from the constraints of preconception, you're free to learn, to explore, and to experience. Through that process you learn that the things that do indeed make you happy are not what you might have expected. You also discover that things you thought were the key to your happiness were nothing of the sort or were never meant to be.
So what makes me happy? What did I discover in my solitude? A great many things. I'm ready to be happy, and perhaps that's the biggest discovery of all.
(c) J.J. Goodman 2014. All rights reserved.