J.J. Goodman: Writings, Musings and More

Sooooo…. Using the dog to practice swaddling may not have been the best pre-parenting idea I've ever had….   (HAHAHAHA… wait… you didn't, really, did you?)       (Dear sweet cripes, you did.)   In all honesty, she really was a good sport about it.   (Yeah, we're thinking not so much. Look at that look on her face….)   Don't let her fool you. She's a cuddler. In any event, this isn't the first time we've utilized the local canine for parenting practice. She's taken quite the active role in preparing us for this whole raising another human being thing. Here she is, enrapturously listening and following along as mom-to-be reads her the most incredible book one our more incredibler friends gave to us: The Feminist Baby .       (Wait, your fiancée is participating in this nonsense now? And… that sentence made my brain weep. Enrapturously? Incredibler??? )   I'...

I learned two things this weekend: 1) our friends and family are incredibly kind, caring, and generous; and B) babies come with a lot of crap.   (Well, for the first couple of months, pretty much all they do is eat and po—)   That's not what I meant! Well, okay, it's kind of what I meant, because we did get a whole lot of diapers. More specifically, the baby shower was this weekend, and the nursery, which yours truly painted and readied himself, thankyouverymuch, is now half-full with boxes and bags and onesies and wipes and swaddling cloths and burp cloths and cloths to clean the other cloths and more wraps and I'm pretty sure the Shroud of Turin is in there somewhere and stuffed animals and teething rings and something called a "Diaper Genie" and I do NOT want to know what comes out of that if you rub it and….   Holy. Crap.     (Take a deep breath sport, this is just the beginning.)   I know. But… holy sweet bejeeb...